Jessie J Responds to Critics About Bisexuality

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Jessie J responds to the millions of tweets, comments and articles written about her sexuality.

This first appeared on her twitter, we have only included spacing to make it easier to read.
See the original.

Warning: This tweet is defo over 120 characters….

The hate on my TL is uncalled for and ridiculous! I never lied about my sexuality, I never labelled myself, the media and some of the public did. I said almost 5 years ago now.

I have dated girls and boys.
Quote me! Which I had! Am I denying that…? No!

I was young and I experimented!
Who hasn’t?

Not with just this topic, but anything! It’s part of life! No lies there.
So happened I was becoming famous at the very same time and felt pressure to tell everyone all my business that really looking back was really no ones to know. I fell for a person who happened to be a girl. Every other relationship I’ve had has been with a man.

My record label didn’t care and it wasn’t part of my launch!
Then I was asked in an interview back in the day about relationships, first time ever, and I was honest and then BAM it took over, the word bisexual before my name on almost every article I read? Like I had to say it when I introduced myself? It was crazy. Instantly I was boxed.

But at the same time felt I was put forward as spokes person to break out of those same boxes? Weird. Who made it a big deal? Me? No. The media? Yes.

I’m not looking for sympathy I am just being real.
And yeah I have learnt to keep things private the hard way because of this exact reason.

So I keep my relationships private now.
To keep my sanity. I put it into songs not articles that can be edited.

I apologise to anyone who is offended by me calling dating girls a “phase” but I have to be honest with me for me. And for me it was.

What else do I call it if I no longer have a want for it anymore? I’m talking for me remember. Not you.
I didn’t generalise, I didn’t say bisexuality isn’t real.

It is for some and some people grow up dating both men and woman forever. And that’s ok. And some don’t. Simple. And I don’t have any reason to lie? Should I have lied and said I am bi, because I’m not, yet isn’t that worse than telling the truth? How would of people have reacted then?

Please tell me what I have done wrong here? I haven’t spoken of being bi for years.
All my songs are sung from me about “him”. I didn’t discuss my personal life in my autobiography. Which came out 2 years ago. Reading “Jessie J comes out as straight” today, even typing that feels absolutely ridiculous.
What has the world come to? Lol! Seriously, this is crazy.

The media ofcourse are going to make this a HUGE thing. Which they are. for your originality.

But I won’t stand down and be made to feel like I have killed someone or said something that deserves the messages I am currently receiving. I did and still do stand for love who you love, whichever gender that is.

And I will continue to stand for it and just not act on it because I don’t want to. It isn’t who I am.
I see my fans becoming who they are and it’s amazing!

Whatever sexuality they chose, or have chosen, love is love.
Everyone has their own journey and story, and mine can’t go how you would rather it go. I have to live for me.

Just to be clear this was NEVER a publicity stunt or for album sales.
I won’t even argue that point. Because it’s just so silly and such a lazy accusation that I won’t even go there.

I will say this, the reason I decided to put it out there in a more direct way. Even though it isn’t what I thought I would ever even do. Is because some people believed what they read instead of what I was/am saying and singing about then and now.

I was getting increasingly frustrated with still feeling like sexuality was defining me as an artist. Behind close doors I am evolving into the woman I want to be forever, wanting a husband and kids one day and dreaming up my future just like everyone else.

Yet I go to work and it was like people were 3 years behind and wanted me to be someone Im not. I soon realised unless I said it more in black and white it would continue. People accusing me of dating my female friends, yet when I was out with a man I was actually dating no one would say anything or even notice. Weird.

People were seeing and noticing what they wanted and not looking at the truth.
So I as I am writing my 3rd album I believe I owe it to myself and my fans to be me.

Which I am doing tbh, just speaking on something to set the record straight.
That wasn’t supposed to be a joke. And at 26 I shouldn’t be anything but. Whatever backlash and hurtful things I will incur.
I am only singing about loving a man and being broken hearted by a man.
Because I only date men.

I want my music to come out and people understand where it’s coming from, and for me not to feel guilty when people are painting a picture of me when the brush isn’t in my hand. I took the brush back. I have always been true, and honest.
Which is so rare in this industry.

I will admit maybe not always gone about it the right way but hey I’m still new to all of this too remember.
I ask that you support my music. As I did back in 2010 on YouTube.

I ask that you respect that I don’t judge you on every detail of your past as I will never know of your past.
And you let mind (sic) stay as mine and let me continue to grow and change just like every other human being.

I will not speak on this topic anymore.
It’s irrelevant to what this dream Is supposed to be about. Irrelevant to why people even know who I am if they do in the first place!
The music! It needs to be about the music.

Thank you to everyone who supports my music. Now to the studio I go to finish my 3rd album ❤️

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  1. Estelle Parker

    I’d just like to say someone bisexual isn’t someone who goes through there whole life dating men & women. They may have dated a man a few times or a woman a few times etc and then go into a long term relationship with either sex for a life time. The term bisexual is all about being attracted to both sexes which Jessie J has admitted to, whether this was a phase or not. Good luck to her finding her husband. I think people were a bit disappointed how she dismissed her previous attraction to women.

  2. Jessica Read

    I find it so weird that people have any business to talk and discuss someone else’s sexualaity and preferences when they don’t useally know their own. I have turned 60 and am a transwoman. I define who I am by what I am. I have evolved since I was 3. I now realise I have always had relationships only with women and now announced to all my friends that I am fem gay. Some of them think I am really a man dating women. I really don’t care. I have been intimate sexually with both men and women but for a relationship to have any meaning for me I realise it could only be with another woman … whether she was physically born female or a transwoman. I can’t stand all of this stuff and I think it is no ones’ business to discuss such things but they think it is. People come up to me and tell me that they have discovered what I am and stuff. I knew at 3 what I was, der. I am behind (on top) of Jessie J all the way. It’s like being an actor in a fem gay film and telling people you either are gay or not. Acting is acting. It’s no ones’ business to label someone else. Labels are for people who are disturbed by the diversity of life. Every car is not the same colour and every person isn’t either. I have just been catching up on reading and that is why I am a bit late in reading this article. Yes, I am very outspoken. Yes, I do not tollerate bullying and discrimination. I am called confrontational by doctors because I don’t just turn the other cheek. I can see a back lash occuring like the USA gay rights rebelion when people said that they had had enough. And for the record we are all born born bisexual? Na! We are just born …. the rest we have to become aware of in the world around us. Some people choose not to even open their eyes and others hate what they see. The truth is the truth and it is that simple. Anything else is a lie. Hugs and love to all the good people out there. I am met so many that it makes me think that there may be hope yet. x JEs

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