A Stalker’s Guide to Online Stalking

Let’s not pretend we don’t stalk each other online. Let’s just not.

When you’re checking your crushes photos and they look hot in every picture

When you see someone else leaving flirty comments on their pictures and you get mad

But you have to resist the temptation to comment too much for fear of seeming too keen

When you see a particularly hot photo of them and you just stare at their perfection for a while

When you realise you’re a year into her photos and have to stay sneaky and not like any pictures

And when you accidentally like one of the photos and realise you can never see her again

But when she suddenly likes one of yours and you’re like…

But then you remember you’re trying to stay cool