What if you DON’T fit into a lesbian cliché?

We know it’s a lesbian cliché, but that doesn’t mean it doesn’t apply to a lot of us still. But what happens if you don’t fit the cliché?

First of all, don’t panic. Not being a cliche doesn’t make you any less of a lesbian or a fantastic human being for that matter. For a start the younger generation seem to have a more ‘casual’ approach to relationships and hooking up in general so it only makes sense that some younger people choose to not wear their hearts on their sleeves and confess their undying love for their partners as quickly.

And what if, when you get a little more seasoned, you still don’t fit that cliché? Maybe you’ve been hurt by another in the past, are scared to fall hard again and that’s why you don’t ‘fit’. While that may sound like a plot line to a rom com it’s legit, and being a lesbian doesn’t exempt you from it. There are some mean people out there. Some people have a string of bad relationships behind them, but hey you have to kiss a few lady frogs before you find your princess. After those kinds of experiences building a personal barrier is something that comes naturally, and that’s ok. Some people just prefer to keep things casual, if your partner prefers this kind of relationship just keep an eye out for reasons why and make sure you aren’t being strung along for the ride. Others might just be used to a more isolated lifestyle. Maybe they are just introvert or an only child. It might just take those people a little longer to warm up to the idea of sharing space with someone constantly.

As long as you are not a complete ice queen Miss Right should be understanding, even if she does want you to move in after a month. The key word is ‘compromise’. Understand that if after five years you still don’t want to move in with her that’s going to be upsetting for her, and that perhaps you’re being a tad unreasonable. At the same time, if you have good reasons for taking things a little slower your partner should be understanding and not take it personally. After all, life and love is all about balance.


(Image credit: Kimberly Linn https://instagram.com/lesbianemojis/)



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