Agony Aimee: Dating An Older Woman

Dear Agony Aimee,

I am 19, I have recently come out and I have feelings for an older woman. I’m not sure about going out with her as I am worried she has far more experience than me and I’m scared it will put her off. What should I do about it?

G

Dear G,

First of all, congratulations on coming out! You just made a huge step in the Personal Happiness direction.

In regards to dating an older woman, plenty of us do it, have done it and will do it so don’t feel like you’re the only one. Is she gay? Do you have chemistry? I assume there is seeing as you’re writing to me about her. If so maybe you should take a leap of faith and ask her out. You have nothing to lose by doing so, and besides, if you don’t, you might always wonder what could have been.

She may have already shown signs that she likes you and perhaps she’s leaving the ball in your court because she might be wondering if you would want to date someone older than yourself. She might even feel a sense of responsibility and be worried to make the first move as a result.

Try spending some more time together, meeting her friends and seeing whether you feel comfortable in her life. Does it feel too grown up or can you see yourself fitting in? And how about your life? Can you see her comfortably hanging out with your friends?

With regards to the experience thing, if like each other it won’t be a problem. She will probably be a good guide and when you really like one another, that sort of thing simply isn’t an issue.

So take the dive and go for it.

Love,

Agony Aimee